And Kim Came Running Outside Naked

Broker Booger-pickin' Finger

Broker Booger-pickin’ Finger

Kim knows she’s not supposed to answer her iPhone when she’s in the shower. If the phone gets wet we’ll be saying goodbye to $700. Her wise and handsome husband has repeatedly warned her about this. No matter, that morning, as she bathed, when her phone rang, she answered it.


Seconds later, Kim came running out of the house naked!!!


You see, when Kim answered the phone, I was the one calling, and I was screaming, “Get back to the barn NOW!!!”


While trying to load our six-foot Bushhog onto a flatbed trailer with my tractor’s frontend loader, the 1,400 pound Bushhog slammed down on the four fingers of my right hand like a guillotine. (A Bushhog is a heavy-duty cutter used to mow pastures.)


Two things were certain: First, I was sure several fingers had been severed from my hand. Second, with my hand trapped under 1,400 pounds of steel, I wasn’t going anywhere until someone used the tractor’s loader to lift the Bushhog off my fingers.


What does this have to do with real estate investing? Everything! Read on.


When pulling up to the barn to begin the task of loading the cutter, as I got out of the truck, I saw my iPhone laying on the armrest. Knowing I was about to do some dangerous work, the little voice in my head said, “Willie, you’d better put that phone in your pocket…just in case something goes wrong!” With that, I slid the phone in my jeans.


When the Bushhog slammed down, a million quick thoughts flew through my head. My first action was to try and lift the implement. At 1,400 pounds, it didn’t budge. Next, I realized my heart was racing and I was entering panic mode. I closed my eyes and calmed my mind with the phrase: Mind like water. Once my brain was fully engaged, the things I needed to do, and the order in which they needed to be done, became crystal clear.


Thankfully, I was wearing work gloves and blood wasn’t gushing out of the right-hand one. This meant my fingers hadn’t been severed. Then – and I’ll be forever grateful to the voice in my head – I reached in my pocket with my left hand, took out the phone and called Kim…and she answered!


Without a second thought, Kim jumped out of the shower. She grabbed her PJs and car keys, sprinted out the front door naked, and made it back to me within seconds. Question: What if I hadn’t had my phone in my pocket or Kim hadn’t answered her phone?


Lesson: When Kim calls, I answer the phone – no matter who I’m talking to or what I’m doing. And she does the same for me.


Over the years, I’ve been with people who’ve lost an eye, broken bones, and gotten gashes. Accidents happen. When they do, you need to be able to immediately call for help. Keep your phone in your pocket!


In addition, when on a job sight, wear safety glasses, work gloves and boots, hearing protection and carry a knife. Protect yourself!


It turned out the only damage done was the breaking of the booger-pickin’ finger on my right hand. My splinted finger caused Trey Alexander to smile. I blame Trey for the accident because I was taking the Bushhog to him to repair.


For the record, Trey is a great guy who runs H&M Trailers in Adairsville. In addition to trailers, I’m pretty sure Trey sells more horse feed in a week than the country of Laos sells in a year. But to be fair, Laos sells way more feed for water buffalos than does Trey…not many water buffalos in Adairsville, don’t you know.


Kim now has my OK to answer the phone in the shower any time she wants. So if you call her, there’s a good chance you’re talking to her naked – her, not you!


Bill and Kim’s North Georgia Real Estate Investors Association meets on the 2nd Thursday of each month, from 7 to 9 p.m., at the beautiful Hilton Garden Inn off Main Street in Cartersville, Georgia. For more info, go to